Friday, December 4, 2009

Pain again

I feel as if I've been sucked into the vortex of chaos again. My last post was a couple of weeks ago and I was feeling very good and I mean in all ways, spiritually, emotionally, physically which is a big deal. So I was just minding my own business driving to work and wham, I get t-boned. I spent the next few moments shaking off the shock, assessing the damage, and trying to remain calm for the teenage girls that had plowed into me. (I drive through a high school zone each morning on the way to my middle school.) No one was bleeding, the cars could be driven, everyone had insurance and my looking for the good in the bad worked in those moments. Anyway, the car accident created more "things" to deal with like insurance adjusters, rental cars, doctor appointments, and phone calls. The next day I felt like a train had plowed over me and the pain I had worked so hard to rid myself of came back with a vengeance. My three months of physical therapy on my shoulder was wiped out in that one moment. The new medication that had started working to control the overall pain I felt on a daily basis stopped working overnight. The clenching of my teeth that is triggered by stress and creates pain in my face, neck, and shoulder that had been alleviated by letting a chiropractor pop my neck for the last three months suddenly returned. The pain in my shoulder is unrelenting; it now radiates down my arm. It speaks to me all day and keeps me awake at night. I have asked God for healing and relief. You see my life ticks on. I do not have the luxury of stopping and wallowing in this pain. I still enjoyed hosting Thanksgiving, going with my family to see the Rockettes, doing a little shopping, getting out the Christmas things, going to church, teaching sixth graders every day, and just being with my family. Today I'm asking God what I need to do to rid myself of this pain.

2 Corinthians 12:8-9 Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.


deb said...

I am so sorry to read this. Of course it could have been worse and all that, but it doesn't alleviate the pain . Or the mental frustration.
Feeling for you.

Annesta said...

God bless you and may you feel relief from your pain.
Grace and peace